"I Saw God Today"

          Today was mother's day... not just any mother's day- but, my first mother's day , as a mom. 

It was a good day. Adyson slept in until pretty late, for her normal 6:05 wake-up, like in some way she knew it was a day for her mom, and she should hold off on her morning jabber, for at least 45 minutes longer than the normal wake up call. We stayed in bed for an unnecessary amount of time, but- I can't help but to hang out with her as much as, and as long as possible, when I can on days like today... I'd give everything to be able to get more moments like that.. 

My head, nice and snug next to her forehead, while she lays there half awake, half asleep, waiting for me to make my move after a long time of contemplating, coffee- or more sleep, one arm wrapped around her stomach like she was my softest, most-delicate pillow in the house. That is where I'd rather stay, in bed with my hunnie, snuggled next to her mom; not a care in the world. 

The world however, has a way, of pulling us out of bed. Dragging us to our feet; the unvierse silently giving us our chores and to-do lists for the day, letting us know that to waste another minute, means too many things will remain undone. So, we stop doing the things we would rather be doing, and move onto the tedious and often monotonous parts of our days. Sometimes I look at a day or two at a time and think, where did those days, and hours even go? You turn on auto-pilot and just coast through the day, then before you know it another week is behind you and so on and so forth.

It was easier to live that life, that way without a baby in the picture. Life could go by without any worries about the time that's been missed. Days and weeks and sometimes months often flew by without even having to think about the time that's past. Measuring of time often recorded solely by the pay-check cycle, a funny story or a picture or two to make us remember a day or a moment that's gone by.

Now although time seems to go all too fast for my liking, there's moments that I feel last forever (not just the, waiting in the doctor's office for the slow doctor, never nurse of course, type of waiting). This is the type of slow motion moment that you literally feel like time is slowing down, just to take it all in- with a nice deep, cleansing breath letting the moment completely take over everything and anything in your body and mind. That moment today, driving home from my mom's, after burgers and Sunday/ Mother's day hangout time.

It was just after 7pm, heading home. I decided to take another trip around the block because Adyson was enjoying the ride in the backseat, kicking her barefeet in her pajamas, looking out the window enjoying the view with the window only slightly cracked to give her a little breeze. The sun was still out, mid-sky ready to start the retreat for sunset...It reminded me of all of the nights driving out to the beach in high school, just for fun, just for a mini-trip to the lake and pier.

 Adyson had her feet crossed like she was sitting in the most comfortable recliner, kicked back in her pajamas, relaxing in her carseat, head titled slightly, resting effortlessly against the side of her carseat and looking out the window. She was talking to herself, chewing on her fingers and her toy-keys for a while, until she got quiet.

Sucked into the powerful zone of sleep and being awake...

I turned my rear view mirror to see her behind me, figuring she'd gone to sleep. But as i pulled to a stop at the stop light, and looked into the backseat she was sitting- peacefully looking out of the window at a tree just outside the window a the edge of the road. I reached back to touch the bottom of her foot, to tickle her and pull her out of her trance, and she turned to me, big heavy blue eyes, tired but completely attentive to my touch. And she smiled. The toothless grin that melts me, the one that takes every bit of sadness, anger, and probably most any negative emotion in me- and wipes the slate clean.

That's the moment when you're super mom. When everything you do is right and perfect, nothing you do could be wrong, you are the lifeline, you are the source of everything good for that little one. The one smile seems to just radiate through you with more power than you'd ever feel from any one human- and a tiny-human at that! It's the best healer, and It truly is,  the best medicine.

"I've been to church
I've read the book
I know he's here
But I don't look
Near as often as I should
Yeah, I know I should
His fingerprints are everywhere
I just slowed down to stop and stare
Opened my eyes and man I swear
I saw God today"

--George Strait

"I Saw God Today"